Ep. #179: Motivation Monday: The Problem With “Finding Your Passion”

[00:00:00] You don’t find passions. I really don’t believe in that. I think you have to create passions through curiosity, through interest, and ultimately through hard work.

Hey, this is Mike from muscle for life and welcome to another episode of my podcast. This episode is part of a weekly series that I have dubbed motivation Monday. Yes, I know. So creative of me. What can I say? I’m just a genius. Seriously though, the idea here is simple. Every Monday morning I am going to post a short and punchy episode that I hope gets you fired up to tackle the workouts, work, and everything else that you have planned for the week ahead.

Because it’s fun. It’s one thing to know what you want to do, but it’s something else all together to actually make yourself do it. And I hope that this series gives you a jolt [00:01:00] of energy and encouragement to go ahead and do all of those things that you want to do. So if you like what you hear, then make sure to check back in.

Every Monday morning for the latest and greatest installment. All right. This week’s quote comes from the one and only Socrates. And he said, bad men live that they may eat and drink. Whereas good men eat and drink that they may live. How many people are told every day that if they were to just follow their passion, that everything would work out.

That if they just somehow divined what they were fated to do, and then did it, they would eventually be living the dream of having fulfilling work, great pay, autonomy, respect, and all of the other great things that make life worth living. That idea never really clicked for me because Many of the people that I know that are highly engaged in their work and very successful in it had [00:02:00] no idea in advance what they were going to do with their lives.

They weren’t the ones that were smacking golf balls with perfect form at two years old or pursuing their childhood fantasies or even doing things that they were always good at. In many cases, their journeys To where they are today were pretty haphazard. There weren’t many brilliant master plans or Churchillian notions of their destinies that they were fulfilling.

Quite to the contrary, these people more or less stumbled their way into their respective fields. And stuck around long enough to find good opportunities and then capitalized on those opportunities. And in many cases, these people wound up doing and eventually loving things that they never thought that they could enjoy.

Mike Rowe, who is the host of the show, dirty jobs. He delivered a fantastic speech on this subject in a Ted talk that [00:03:00] I highly recommend you Google and find if you just Google. Ted micro. And I think it’s called learning from dirty jobs. It’s about 20 minutes long, but it’s well worth it. And in that talk, he talks about people that are doing things like pig farming and making pottery from cow poop, things that, Something tells me that these people weren’t really dreaming of doing these things as young boys and girls, but now are very happy with what they’re doing.

And I think that his talk really strikes at the heart of the problem with the advice of finding your passion. Because, You don’t find passions. I really don’t believe in that. I think you have to create passions through curiosity, through interest, and ultimately through hard work. Hey, quickly, before we carry on, if you are liking my podcast, would you please help spread the word about it?

Because no amount of marketing or [00:04:00] advertising gimmicks can match the power of word of mouth. So if you are enjoying this episode and you think of someone else who might enjoy it as well, please do tell them about it, it really helps me. And if you are going to post about it on social media, definitely tag me so I can say Thank you.

You can find me on Instagram at Muscle4LifeFitness, Twitter at Muscle4Life, and Facebook at Muscle4LifeFitness. And to that point, we can look to Mike Rowe again in a reply that he wrote to a fan who wrote to him asking for some career advice. Here’s the letter from the fan. Hey Mike, I’ve spent this last year trying to figure out the right career for myself and I still can’t figure out what to do.

I’ve always been a hands on kind of guy and a go getter. I could never be an office worker. I need change, excitement, and adventure in my life, but where the pay is steady. I grew up in construction. And my first job was a restoration project. I love everything [00:05:00] outdoors. I play music for extra money. I like trying pretty much everything, but get bored very easily.

I want a career that will always keep me happy, but can allow me to have a family and get some time to travel. I figure if anyone knows jobs, it’s you. So I was wondering your thoughts on this. If you ever get the time, thank you, Parker. Hall and here’s Mike’s reply. Hi, Parker. My first thought is that you should learn to weld and move to North Dakota.

The opportunities are enormous. And as a hands on go getter, you’re qualified for the work. But after reading your post a second time, it occurs to me that your qualifications are not the reason you can’t find the career. You want, I had drinks last night with a woman. I know let’s call her Claire. Claire just turned 42.

She’s cute, smart, and successful. She’s frustrated though, because she can’t find a man. I listened all evening about how difficult her search has been about how all the good ones were taken about how her other friends had found their soulmates and how it wasn’t fair that she had [00:06:00] not look at me. She said, I take care of myself.

I’ve put myself out there. Why is this so hard? How about that guy at the end of the bar, I said? He keeps looking at you. Not my type. Really? How do you know? I just know. Have you tried a dating site, I asked? Are you kidding? I would never date someone I met online. Alright, how about a change of scene? Your company has offices all over, maybe try living in another city?

What? Leave San Francisco? Never. Alright, how about the other side of town? Mix it up a little. Visit different places. New museums, new bars, new theaters. She looked at me like I had two heads. Why the hell would I do that? Here’s the thing, Parker. Claire doesn’t really want a man. She wants the right man.

She wants a soulmate. Specifically, a soulmate from her zip code. She assembled this guy in her mind years ago, and now, dammit, she’s tired of waiting. Damn. I didn’t tell her this because Claire has the capacity for sudden violence, but it’s true. She complains about being alone even though her rules have more or less [00:07:00] guaranteed she’ll stay that way.

She has built a wall between herself and her goal. A wall made of conditions and expectations. Is it possible that you’ve built a similar wall? Consider your own words. You don’t want a career, you want the right career. You need excitement and adventure, but not at the expense of stability. You want lots of change and the freedom to travel, but you need the certainty of steady pay.

You talk about being easily bored, as though boredom is out of your control. It isn’t. Boredom is a choice. Like tardiness or interrupting, it’s one thing to love the outdoors, but you take it a step further. You vow to never take an office job. You talk about the needs of your family, even though that family doesn’t exist.

And finally, you say the career you describe must always make you happy. These are my thoughts. You may choose to ignore them, and I wouldn’t blame you, especially after being compared to a 40 year old woman who can’t find love, [00:08:00] but since you asked, stop looking for the right career and start looking for a job, any job.

Forget about what you like. Focus on what’s available, get yourself hired, show up early, stay late, volunteer for the scut work, become indispensable. You can always quit later and be no worse off than you are today, but don’t waste another year looking for a career that doesn’t exist. And most of all, stop worrying about your happiness.

Happiness does not come from a job, it comes from knowing what you truly value and behaving in a way that’s consistent with those beliefs. Many people today resent the suggestion that they’re in charge of the way they feel. But trust me, Parker, these people are mistaken. That was a big lesson from Dirty Jobs, and I learned it several hundred times before it stuck.

What you do, who you’re with, and how you feel about the world around you is completely up to you. Good luck. [00:09:00] Mike. P. S. I’m serious about welding in North Dakota. Those guys are writing their own ticket. P. S. Think I should forward this to Claire? Now, I’ve probably read that letter 15 times and I still love it.

It’s just so true. You don’t discover passion and the will to work hard and persevere through meditation and meandering. It’s an absolute truth. active process that demands sweat on your brow and dirt on your hands. It’s a hard one reward for hard work, not a chance gift from the ether. This process also requires the willingness to be interested in things to cultivate, nurture, and follow curiosities because you never know what might click and you never know what might lead to making it click.

Again, remember the pig farmer and cow poop potters. Now, for me, one of my passions now is writing. I love the game of trying to turn ideas into just the right words. Words that are interesting, [00:10:00] persuasive, and eloquent. Now. If I had to stop writing, I could easily think of 10 other things that sound very interesting to me, and that with enough work, I know that I could easily develop into passions.

For example, I could get into something in the visual arts. I could get into marketing and advertising work. I could get into developing apps or software as a service products. I could definitely get into publishing other people’s books. I could get into creating board games. I could get into creating t shirts even possibly even learning magic tricks and creating products in that space and on.

Row also hints at another piece of the finding your passion puzzle that I think is vitally important to grasp, and that is you’ll never be passionate about something that you suck at, ever. It’s just the way it is. Competence breeds enthusiasm, and [00:11:00] enthusiasm breeds passion. Without competence, though, there’s no passion.

There will never be enthusiasm and without enthusiasm, there will never be passion. So the autonomy impact and respect that many people want out of their work and careers are almost just byproducts of getting really good at something so good that people simply can’t ignore you. It’s just that simple cause and effect.

And I think that many people that complain, about hating their work would enjoy it a lot more if they just got better at it. And if they just worked at getting better at it, studied, practiced, experimented, did whatever it took. And sure, some jobs are more routine and limited in scope and kind of inherently monotonous than others.

Some jobs have a rather low competence ceiling, so to speak. But if you’re in a position like that, and it’s not for you, then why waste your time with such work? There is [00:12:00] so much more that you could be doing. Why not transition into something more challenging? So it’s either do that or embrace the work simplicity and find something contenting about it.

And as Ro says in his Ted talk, which I highly recommend you go and listen to roadkill picker uppers whistle while they work. Hey there, it is Mike again, I hope you enjoyed this episode and found it interesting and helpful and if you did and don’t mind doing me a favor and want to help me make this the most popular health and fitness podcast on the internet, then please leave a quick review of it on iTunes or wherever you’re listening from.

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Lastly, if you didn’t like something about the show, then definitely shoot me an email at mike at musclefullife. com and share your thoughts on how you think it could be better. I read everything myself and I’m always looking for constructive feedback. So please do reach out. All right. That’s it. Thanks again for listening to this episode, and I hope to hear from you soon.

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