Well, spring is here (but it’s still snowing in Virginia, WTF Al Gore), and that means it’s about that time for da crew to starting bustin’ out tha stringerz to trawl tha beachez for fly hunniez.
Actually, it means it’s time to another monthly update. 🙂
Here’s the latest inside baseball . . .
A new book is imminent.
Mum has been the word on this project, but now that its publication is right around the corner (May/June), I’m ready to start blathering. 🙂
My newest book is called The Little Black Book of Workout Motivation, and it’s a significant departure from my existing titles.
Instead of focusing on the “outer game” of getting fit—the mechanics of diet, nutrition, and exercise—it’s dedicated to the “inner game” of getting into great shape, and particularly on the deepest and most primal emotional need of anyone looking to build a body they can be proud of:
This is the pesky itch that everyone who wants to get fit struggles to scratch, because no matter how much we want to get into great shape, there’s no getting around it: taking care of our bodies is hard.
Working out and eating right takes time, energy, effort, discipline, dedication, and patience, and life always seems to find ways to get in the way and tempt us to stray.
It doesn’t ever get easier, either. We just have to get better.
This book will help you get better.
It contains practical scientific research, compelling stories, and time-proven wisdom that will help you find a new and deeper meaning in your fitness journey, identify and overcome inner obstacles that are holding you back, and gain the strength of character needed to press on and not only change your body, but your life.
Again, we’re at the tail end of the publication process and are shooting for a May/June release, so I’ll be bending your ear more on this little guy soon. 🙂
Two new flavors of Pulse are in production.
Our pre-workout Pulse is our first-born son and rightful heir to the throne we’re cobbling together from the skulls of our enemies.
We’ve sold so many bottles that we could use them to make a fleet of Karl-Gerät siege engines. We could melt them down and create the world’s largest sex toy. We could fashion another Ark, in which all of the Lord’s great lifting creatures could be kept swole.
Fantasies aside, the Pulse hype is realer than ever, and that’s why we are working on two new flavors:
- Cherry Limeade
- Pink Lemonade
The first is already approved and ordered (pepper your angus), and the second is very close to done, so both are on the runway for a summer launch.
A new flavor of Recharge is on the way too.
Recharge is our fabulous post-workout supplement, and it’s getting a delicious new flavor: strawberry lemonade!
IMO this is the best flavor yet, so I’ll be excited to hear what you think. It’ll be available for purchase this summer.
Our “lean bulking” study was approved by the ethics board.
I wanted to fund a study to analyze the aerodynamics of buxom anime heroines, but found out that some asshole had already beaten me to it.
Down but not out, I went back to the drawing board and ultimately settled for how different calorie surpluses (5 and 15%) impact muscle and fat gain in people following a resistance training program.
A few of the Übermenschen on Legion’s scientific advisory board, Dr. Eric Helms, Dr. Brad Dieter, and James Krieger, volunteered to design and run the study, and it has just passed the ethics board, so it’s officially going to happen!
Well, that’s all for now! Auf Wiedersehen!
Oh and guess who’s also learning German? Dis guy. The Twitterz says my country is now run by Literally Hitler™, so I figured I’d get ahead of the curve.
Okay fine, that’s not the real reason. I’m actually learning because my wife is German and I want to be able to talk dirty in her native tongue. 😉